Money, Ball

With the nation still dry-heaving its way through this economic hangover, nothing palliates the soul like the beginning of baseball season. We've already seen a 20 inning game and the first no hitter of the season. Even the Astros have finally won a game. Good times, good times.

If you're not lucky enough to be at the game in your town, I'm lining up some reading and listening, dear Reader, for your spring leisure. These articles are loosely related to each other. First is the news that the government is coming after Goldman Sachs. This gives me a glimmer of hope. However, we'll see if it goes anywhere for a couple reasons: a) most of the high ranking gov't financial officials are from Goldman Sachs, and b) with all the shenanigans that clearly happened, how much of it was actually and more importantly, provably illegal? (sort of begs the question if regulation would even work?) Not sure of the implication of this being a civil vs. a criminal type thing.

This next link was forwarded to me the other day by a friend about a hedge fund that was very active in the creation of the financial mess, though again, it's questionable if they did anything illegal. The first 40 minutes of this mp3 are very interesting. Although it may unfairly imply that Magnetar was the main culprit or main agent that caused this whole thing, it at least explains very clearly how some of the worst aspects of it happened. Though, don't forget that none of this could have happened without the Federal Reserve keeping interest rates far too low or without the implicit backing that the Fed and Treasury have given to Wall Street in the event of past and future failures. In other words, the implication is that if we had regulated Magnetar, we could have prevented this, however, the very people we would supposedly trust to regulate Wall Street not only failed to regulate it or themselves but financially encouraged these types of behavior. But a very well done and informative show.

Finally, and this one may be harder to swallow, but it is some commentary by William Deresiewicz about the disadvantages of an elite education. The reason I offer this for consideration is related to the tight link between the Ivy League and our government financial institutions (e.g., Goldman Sachs and the Federal Researve). Do we not give passes to too many people simply because they are "smart" and went to a top school? Perhaps we would change our perspective if we considered that Harvard may be producing more crooks every year than Harlem.

But back to baseball. At a recent game in Milwaukee, I was dismayed to find the triangle nacho chip had infiltrated Miller Park as well. Is nothing sacred? A couple nice reads about the Boys of Summer. First, is an interesting ranking of the organizations of baseball. Boston and St. Louis top the list, and I'll let you find out for yourselves who is at the bottom. Then, a nice little blog about the latest, greatest pitching prospect in the game, Stephen Strasburg, last year's number one draft pick. This also calls to mind that even if you can't get to a Major League ballpark, there is plenty of good baseball in the minors and independent leagues. In fact, in some ways, they offer a much better baseball experience.

So whether you're more interested in the ivy at Cambridge or the walls of Wrigley, take heart! Spring is taking us into summer, one pitch at a time.

[April 22, Editor's Addition: Here's a link for those interested to a speech given by the same William Deresiewicz about Solitude and Leadership.]

Around The Horn

"All the hits the Nits missed."

In science news, the magazine ScienceNews recently printed an article about the successful teleportation of matter. A qubit was transferred between two atoms. It is my believe that a qubit is something that is so small that you've never heard of it before. We still have a ways to go before we can beam Coovo around the universe, but it's a start.

"But what would be the point of beaming Coovo around the universe?" you ask with a condescending tone, "Earth is the only inhabitable planet anyway!"

Not so fast. At a recent meeting of the American Association for the Advancement of Science held in The Loop, astronomer Alan Boss recently posited that there is one earth-like planet for every solar system in the galaxy. There are about 10¹¹ solar systems in our galaxy (the good ole' Milky Way), and 10¹¹ galaxies in the universe. That's a lot of Earths.

How does he know this? He doesn't, of course. But the NASA's Kepler Mission launches on March 5, with the sole purpose to count the number of earth like planets in the Cygnus constellation. Now from my extensive research (the 90 seconds I spent reviewing the wikipedia entry) the Cygnus constellation has 6 known stars with planets. So I don't see exactly how this shows us that there is an earth in each of the 10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 solar systems out there... but perhaps I just need to do more reading on the Kepler Mission. I'll admit this isn't the most thorough research ever blogged.

I wonder how many other earths invented baseball...

It's March, and the players are back on the field. While there are many players out there with numbers like 86 and 72, it's still baseball. Youngsters get a chance to turn some heads. Veterans prove they have a little left in the tank. And everybody else gets to warm it up.

In the next month, the Cards have to find a second basemen, figure out who will man the hot corner until Glaus returns, find a reliever or relievers to close games, and probably most importantly, see if Chris Carpenter is really healthy.

I'm reading Jim Bouton's "Ball Four" right now. It's a good, easy read that I recommend to all of you. The perfect book to read before bed.

A-ROiD?

Sports Illustrated recently ran a story claiming Alex Rodriguez tested positive for steroids in 2003.

I don't know Alex Rodriguez, but from the interviews I read and stories I heard, I didn't think too much of him as a person. And yet, I always admired him as a player because I thought he was clean. Bonds passing Ruth's and Aaron's numbers bothered me, but I always figured it wouldn't matter too much because A-ROD would eventually pass Bonds.

My belief that A-ROD was clean was based on the fact that over his career, he never displayed the abnormal bulk/growth that you saw in Bonds, McGwire and Sosa. That simple layman's test is apparently not valid. According to the SI article, Primobolan, the drug for which Rodriguex is accused of testing positive, "improves strength and maintains lean muscle with minimal bulk development, according to steroid experts, and has relatively few side effects."

TLATL has covered steroids in baseball here, here and here. Aside from TARP and L&O, it's probably our most blogged topic. This is a pretty big story to me, but maybe you all had already priced in the notion that anyone who's anyone in baseball in the last 10 years is a user.

We'll probably never see indisputable proof, so my first question is, do you believe SI's story? If so, are you upset? Disappointed? Indifferent? Does it change your perspective on other players?

Time to Man Up?

"I speak with Manny every three days and he tells me, `Man, no one wants to sign me,' Pujols said Thursday during a news conference. "I'm not an agent or general manager, but I can't understand how Manny has not signed.''

There are a few reasons that no team has reached a deal with free agent Manny Ramirez:

1. The Economy. Across the board, teams are spending less. Aside from the cream of the crop, players that would have received 3, 4 or 5 year deals in previous off-seasons are getting 1 or 2 year deals. Some, like Manny, are still waiting.
2. Manny will be 37 next year. Signing him to the minimum 4-year deal that his agent, Scott Boras, is demanding potentially limits his suitors to those in the Junior Circuit, where they are cursed with the impurity of the Designated Hitter.
3. Attitude. He's flaky. He's selfish. He plays when he wants to play. It's no secret that Manny pretty much faked injuries midway through the season, forcing Boston to trade him, which voided the 2 remaining option years on his contract and allowed he and Boras to seek a new multi-year deal.

There's a few reasons the Cardinals themselves shouldn't sign Manny:

1. No Room. The Cardinals already have a glut of Outfielders. Super-prospect CF Colby Rasmus joins an already crowded group of Rick Ankiel, Ryan Ludwick, Skip Schumaker and Chris Duncan.
2. Bigger Needs. Even if the Cards could make some room in the OF via trades, most would argue that starting pitching and relief pitching are better holes to fill than another bat in the lineup.
3. $$$$. At the beginning of the off-season, the Dodgers didn't bite on Boras' demands for a 5 or even 6 year deal. They offered 2 years, $45 million. Apparently Boras has yet to even dignify that with a response. Pujols posits that Manny may give the Cards a home team discount. I don't buy it. If the Cards were to show interest in Manny, Boras would most certainly use that as leverage to get offers from the Dodgers (or as rumored, the Giants) raised. If there's one thing we've learned about Scott Boras, he doesn't give discounts.
   

There's a couple reasons the Cards should sign Manny.

1. Manny Still Rakes. He's probably one of the top 3 hitters in the last 12 years, and even at 36, after he was traded to the Dodgers he put up a .396/.489/.743 line in 222 PA. He has a career line of .314/.411/.593 (for comparison's sake, the 29(?) year old Pujols' career line is .334/.425/.624 ....... yeah... he's still really good..... ).
2. This is the first time that I can remember Pujols suggesting the Cards go after a specific player. I've often wondered how the Cards' purse strings may affect their ability to sign the slugger when he becomes a FA before the 2012 season. Will he become frustrated if Cardinal ownership is content to spend just enough to keep the fans coming but not enough to be a real contender? I'm not suggesting that the musings of a superstar should dictate team policy; I just think it would be a shame for Pujols to sour on the team when it's pretty obvious that Cardinal ownership could afford to expand payroll.

So really, the question isn't do you think the Cards should the Cardinals sign Manny Ramirez, it's how much should the Cards spend on Manny? I'm not asking because I think they should; rather I want to know what you think Manny is worth to the Cards? You're the GM, what do you think?

¡El Hombre!

Not to interrupt the great discussions we've had on the blog in the past couple weeks, but there is some important news coming out of The Lou.

Albert Pujols (aka Prince Albert aka Phat Albert aka The Machine aka El Hombre) has been named the National League's Most Valuable Player in 2008. Albert received 18 of the 32 first place votes, his 369 total points in the ballot edging out Ryan Howard's 308. That Pujols did not receive the other 14 first place votes is incomprehensible, and can only be explained by a federal redistribution of first place votes.

Pujols finished the season with a .357 Batting Average, a .462 On Base Percentage and a .653 Slugging Percentage. Amazingly, only the OBP was a career high. Despite missing 14 games, Pujols still managed to clobber 37 HR, drive in 116 and touch the plate 100 times. His 1.92 ratio of BB/K (104/54) was nearly the inverse of the MLB average (0.48). Albert Pujols' career can perhaps be characterized by two words: dominance and consistency. His 99 Runs in 2007 marked the only time in his career he failed to reach the 30/100/100 HR, R, RBI mark. And oh yeah, he's known for his work ethic in the field, too.

The question that invariably comes up is, can he really be only 28? Whatever his age is, his consistency throughout his career leads one to believe that we could expect many more years like those which he has already put up. A statement like this should of course be followed up by a list of disclaimers about health and his "age" and dead-ball eras and performance enhancing jock-straps, but let's just have some fun with this. After 8 years of watching this guy mash year in and year out (the nickname The Machine is so fitting), it's OK to speculate about Albert finishing among the game's greats (with absolute reverence, of course).

I'm one to argue that the rate stats such as OBP and SLG are better ways to evaluate a player than the typical HR and RBI, but when trying to place someone amongst the billions of players to have played this game, one inevitably turns to the counting stats. (And just so it's noted, Albert's career BA is .334 (23rd All-Time), OBP is .425 (13th All-Time), and SLG is .624 (4th(!) All-Time).

Albert's current HR, R and RBI totals are 319, 947 and 977, respectively. Let's say he doubles those totals. He finishes with 638 HR (good for 5th All-Time), 1894 R (good for 10th All-Time (just behind Stan)) and 1954 RBI (good for 6th All-Time (just ahead of Stan)). Of course these are against the current totals, which will be slightly more crowded with some of today's stars...

Nevertheless, doubling Pujols' stats is not inconceivable. It's not even outlandish to think he could do better. (I've knocked on wood about 18 times while writing this post.)

A-ROD Wins MVP, Opts Out in Search of Bigger Award

In a story that will make even Barry Bonds shake his head in befuddlement, Alex Rodriguez has opted out of the AL MVP award he was awarded yesterday.

While Rodriguez refused to comment, his agent, Scott Bora$$, had this to say, "To present A-ROD with an award like the MVP is akin to spitting in the Pope's eye. I deserve - I mean my client deserves better. Something at the Nobel-level, or at the very least a few Purple Hearts and some General's Stripes. We And we will settle for no less."

After learning the news, second-place finisher Magglio Ordonez shrugged it off, "He did have a pretty good year. It is an honor to finish second to him." At which point Scott Boras (also Ordonez's agent) jumped in, "Oh no, no. Magglio is also opting out of his second-place finish. Magglio deserves the MVP, Manager of the Year, and next year's Cy Young. And we will settle for no less."

Return of the Email Elbow?

As many of you know, it was reported on Aug 17 that the Chicago Cubs and Carlos Zambrano reached a 5 year / $91.5 million deal. With an average salary of $18.3 million / year, Zambrano has the highest average salary / year for all pitchers with a multi-year deal.

Only 26, the fiery Zambrano is already a veteran of the MLB, with 2007 being his 5th full season in the bigs and 5th strait season with 200+ IP. $90+ million is a lot of money for any player, let alone a pitcher, but the Cubs have secured one of the best pitchers in the NL for his ages 27-31. It's not hard to imagine that the Cubs would have had to contend with 6 and 7 year offers for $20 million / year from the likes of the Yanks, Mets, Red Sox and Angels. Taking all that into account, it looks like the Cubs made a smart move.

Or did they? In last 30 days, Zambrano sports a 1-3 record with an ERA of 7.36 and a WHIP of 1.77. Although he's been healthy throughout his career, in the spring of 2005 Zambrano was told to reduce the amount of time he spent on the computer, as it was feared to be causing the pain he was experiencing in his pitching elbow.

With the talent pool in this off-season's free agent class being extremely dry, Zambrano and his agent surely knew that by waiting till the off-season, they could get an even bigger contract - from the Cubs or another suitor. So why wouldn't he wait? Could the last month of lousy pitching be related to an injury that Zambrano is hiding? Was he worried that a trip to the DL or a pre-signing physical would scare other clubs away?

It's possible, but not probable. I think the most likely reason is that Zambrano wanted to remain a Cub, and wanted a deal locked up now. But stirring the pot can be fun, especially when this site is co-authored by a Cub fan. And I'll definitely be keeping an eye out for any news of health issues with the big right-hander, including tonight as I'll be attending the showdown between Zambrano and Wainwright at Busch.

A question to ponder: who would you least like go up to bat against, an angry Randy Johnson, Roger Clemens, or Carlos Zambrano? Someone else?

Fan Unappreciation Day

For a number of years, I have held a very small share of season tickets to St. Louis Cardinals baseball with a group of friends. We have good, cheap seats in the 3rd row of the left field bleachers. It was from that glorious site that I was fortunate enough to watch Adam Wainwright strike out Brandon Inge for the final out of the 2006 World Series. But that's another story.

This post is the recounting of a recent Friday night game against the Cincinnati Reds. Upon arriving before the first inning, I noticed that Bleacher Bob wasn't there. Bob is an older gentleman, and about as devout a fan as you'll find. Bob has season tickets for one bleacher seat in row 4, a few seats to our left. I struggle to make it to 5-10 games a year these days. Bob attends every single one. Although he's a pretty reserved man, his love of the game is easy to see, and he's quick with the high fives after a deserving play.

So after some inquiring, we found out that Bleacher Bob's absence was due to his scheduled appearance on the jumbo-tron in the mid-4th inning. This is typically the time when they play something like a "Let's Make a Deal" with a fan. A fan gets 3 trivia questions in increasing difficulty. The difficulty of the first question is something akin to "What is Albert Pujols' first name?" The second question is harder. If they get it right, they can walk away with a prize (usually something like $50), or go for whatever lies in the case held by "That One Guy"'s lovely assistant. The contents of the case can range from season tickets to Cardinals' gear. Season tix seemed like the obvious prize for Bob.

So the 4th inning rolls along and the Cards' #1 fan is up there with a big grin on his face. I look past his right shoulder and who do I see but my good friend Billy. As most of you who read this blog know, Billy once beat the game of Trivial Pursuit at a game of Trivial Pursuit. Suffice to say, he's got a knack for both useful and useless facts. As the contestants of this game are allowed to lean on friends for support, Bleacher Bob was a shoe in for victory.

The first question was so dumb I can't even remember it. Bob got it on his own.

The second question was "What is the capital of Ohio?". Billy whispered "Columbus" in Bob's ear. Correct. At this point, Bob was presented with the option of taking a certain prize (can't remember exactly what it was), or going for the case. Bob pointed at the case and replied, "I want what's in there."

The third question was "Who hit the last home run in the old Busch Stadium?". Billy supplied Bob with "Chris Duncan". Correct again! "That One Guy" now had the pleasure of opening the case to reveal Bob's prize...

5 coupons each good for one Hardee's Thickburger.

Bob was a good sport and smiled and clapped. He should have punched that guy in the face. You bring a perennial season-ticket holder up to compete for a prize, a guy who probably has worked very hard his whole life to afford himself the luxury of buying season tickets to your event, and he gets 5 Thickburgers?

I'm not sure who's responsible for that, but that person should be fired.

p.s. Ballpark food: Nachos or a Hot Dog?

Hall of Shame

Howdy, folks. Roller here. McFly recently offered a solid suggestion that we diversify our content. While we still have 47 more Law & Order pieces to do and an approaching deadline for our "T.L.A.T.L.: Behind the Blog" reality show pitch, it wouldn't hurt to flex a different part of our brains. And since we're on the topic of flexing...

This post's topic is nothing original. Hence, the incredibly overused title. But I wavered on this subject for quite some time before finally coming to my own conclusion, and I think it merits a post. The topic: Should Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa be elected into the Major League Baseball Hall of Fame?

I asked Coovo if he'd join me on this one, L&O style, and he suggested that we write the post in more of a conversational manner. I agreed, under the condition that I can write as him half the time, and vice versa. He agreed. Or maybe I agreed while perpetrating Coovo.

In any event, I think (hope) the best part will be the comments we get from the handful of loyal readers we are lucky enough to have, all of whom are avid and knowledgeable fans of the Pastime. Play Ball...


Roller: So, we have "the men who saved baseball" at or near the end of their careers, after having piled up power numbers that would make even Josh Gibson raise an eyebrow. In the late 90's, their at-bats put conversations on pause. Fans would linger in a 14-1 stinker just to see their last AB in the 8th or 9th inning (and on the flip side, promptly leave immediately afterward even during a good game). There's no doubt in my mind that I was caught up in it, and I cannot remember giving any concern to performance enhancers at the time. I remember the andro escapade in '98, but felt that McGwire was vindicated in '99 when he said he stopped using it and still hit 65 HRs.


Coovo: If we're going to go into this together, you're going have to stop using big words like "perpetrating", and start using words I can understand, like anabolic steriod or human growth hormone. I talked a little bit about this with a post back in March entitled Pump up the Volume, but the issue here is just about Sosa and McGwire.

I was naive. I just thought that all athletes were tested for steroids. That is why I watched that crazy '98 season with as much excitement as anybody else. I was even at the game where McGwire hit no. 62. I am ashamed as a Cub fan but I clapped for McGwire. Looking back on it now, we are left with nothing but specualtion. I would say that we are left with the words of these men, like when they testified in front of Congress, but too many times in the current sports world we athletes in front of Matt Lauer repenting for their sins.

So Roller. For the sake of argument. As of now, there is no "smoking gun proof", neither player has ever been suspended (for steroids, Sosa had some bad lumber once), and they each have over 580 Home runs. Why wouldn't you vote for them?


Roller: That's a good question. Let's start with this: I think it's obvious that if it was indisputable that neither of them used performance enhancers, and they still put up those numbers, this wouldn't even be a debate. Their first-ballot status would be about as sure a bet as one could make in baseball.

But that's far from the case. So I'll turn it back to you. Do you feel that you'd need proof that they used in order to bar their legendary careers from HOF glory? And when I say proof, I mean more than, you know, Jose Canseco's "The Needle, The Ass, and Biceps of Brass".


Coovo: I'll have to see photos of all of these players' behinds before I can make a judgement. To me, it is Sosa that is the inriguing vote.

We have Canseco's allegations against McGwire, but we also have McGwire not denying he used steroids in front of Congress. That is what is keeping him out of the Hall now, not Canseco. After McGwire went, Sosa denied ever taking them. Then Rafeal Palmerio did as well. Whoops. Sosa sits there literally sandwiched between two "users". Then you look at the evidence against Bonds. Pretty convincing. So of the three players to pass Maris, two have solid circumstantial evidence against them, and again Sosa is along for the ride.

Other than refusing to pee in a cup when asked to out of the blue by a reporter, Sosa's more guilty by association. I believe he was on something, but the proof is less clear than McGwire.


Roller: "Whoops." Nice. I agree with you, although he was never caught using steroids, McGwire's almost tearful refusal to "talk about the past" paints a guilty portrait. And Sosa has never been caught, and has denied using. On the surface, one does look a little guiltier than the other.

Now that I'm done with an objective response, I have to throw in what I believe. Not based on facts, but my gut (and admittedly somewhat biased by my allegiance to a certain ballclub for which McGwire played). I can't help it, I just love those Athletics.

I believe McGwire to be a good person. After signing his first contract with the Cards, he started giving $1 million / year to his foundation for abused children (again just about crying when announcing it). The guy is a softie. I believe he is a good person who made a very, very bad decision. And he knows it. And he feels guilty now. I am in know way suggesting that his good deeds exonerate his (alleged) steroid use, but I believe his conscience won't let him deny using them.

I can't say I've seen those qualities in Sammy. Of course, my opinion of Sosa's character is worth about as much as he can throw me (mixed metaphors rule!). But here are some items that helped formulate my opinion on Sammy:

• Sammy can speak fluent English. He speaks it incredibly well in most interviews. Yet anytime he gets in a little trouble (the steroid proceedings, the corked bat), he puts on his immigrant smile and plays the "No espeaka de english" card.


• Like McGwire, Sammy also started a charity organization. His was based in his home country, the Dominican Republic. Now, I heard this so long ago that I can't say if it was on CNN or A Current Affair, but I remember hearing that the charity hadn't received a good chunk of promised money from Sammy, and that Sammy's relatives were driving new cars bought in the charity's name.

You can feel free to tell me to go to hell on these points, because they're not much. And I'd love to hear stories of Sammy rescuing a blind person's HIV-infected kitten from a burning tree. But the guy just seems a little shady to me.

So to sum up this long winded response, I guess I just feel that you have two people who are guilty. One just has a heavier conscience than the other.

Coovo?..... You awake?.....


Coovo: Barely. I've had more intersting reads while presuing the Better Home & Gardens Igloo edition.

I don't disagree with you about Sosa the person, but if being a good guy were criteria for the Hall of Fame, then we'd have to have a recount. The Hall of Fame vote is based on what one does on the field, not with his charity organizations. Unless of course he wagered on what happened on the field.

I have no doubt that now McGwire thinks what he did was wrong. He's probably very regretful. He probably won't let his son do steroids until college. Sorry, I couldn't resist. Who knows what Sammy is (other than being "berry berry good at baseball)? Although I do need to hear some of those "fluent English" interviews. If McGwire did roids a few years in Oakland. Well, that's one thing. But if he used all the way through his 70 home run season, that's another.

Roller: I suppose we'll only know if McGwire tells us (which I have a feeling he will at some point) or if Jimmy Ballgame writes a book about sticking needles in Mac's pimpled arse. I don't think McGwire's size diminished at all when he donned The Birds on The Bat - he actually seemed to be bigger than ever - so I'm guessing that he used during the 1998 season. Honestly, if he only used a few years in Oakland and hit a clean 70 HRs, what the hell is he crying about?

"The Hall of Fame vote is based on what one does on the field, not with his charity organizations." True, at least that's how it's been done in the past. We can save the "Would you vote Ty Cobb into the HOF?" debate for a breather in the "Growing Pains and Wonder Years" mini-series we've got queued up for the Fall.

But my point wasn't really that Sosa should be held from the Hall because he's not a Saint. I was just pointing to traits that, like the "bad lumber" incident, make me inclined to believe he's OK with cheating.

So, we've danced around the answer enough. Point Blank: Given what evidence exists right now, would you vote for either McGwire or Sosa? I'll even say Sosa plays till the end of 2008 and finishes with 625.


Coovo: You're a point blank. A Grosse Point Blank to be exact.

The whole MLB process in my mind has lost credibility with this issue, and that includes the Hall of Fame. I hate the cop-out, "it wasn't against baseball's rules." Everyone has known steroids were wrong since Ben Johnson lost his gold medal in the 1988 Seoul Olympics. But even after this event, 10 years before the home run chase, all of baseball--Owners, the Union, the Commisioners office--still ignored the issue. Now, a dark cloud sits over the whole game. And that cloud includes the Hall of Fame and nothing short of a rigged up Delorean time machine will remove this cloud.

I vote yes to both players. In the end, MLB should share as much blame as the players. And we can't penalize MLB. Only the players will know whether the plaque on the wall is a fraud and they'll have to live with it.

Roller: I can see your point. It's like that Van Halen song where they're like "I see both sides now". I think it's that one. Either that one or "Why Can't This Be Love?" Cause I'll be damned if I get hung out on the line!

Is MLB to blame? Without a doubt. But the players made their own choices; acted under their own will. What bothers me the most is that Sosa and McGwire were incredibly talented players. We all know McGwire hit 49 HR in his rookie year. Speed was as much a part of Sosa's game as power before his legs got so big that running was a fire hazard. We'll never know exactly what kind of numbers they would have put up. That irritates me.

If you hadn't guessed by now, I vote no to both players. I think a "yes" is essentially saying "it's too late now" to right the ship. Baseball has made many a mistake in the past, but that's no excuse to continue.

Well, there you have it. A split decision. We leave with the actual conversation from the pitcure above.

S: Hey Big Mac! You da man!

M: Hey Sammy. Nice walk.

S: The ump make good calls. He was berry berry good to me. You da man!

M: I know. Your arms are massive dude. Whatcha ya bench?

S: I eat horse pill, my arms double in size, I hit da homer. You da man!

M: Damn right. You wanna do some andro after the game?

S: Only if it make my neck turn into leather like you! You da man!

Mr. McCoy, meet Mr. Coover

So over the weekend I saw an old episode of Law & Order. In this particular episode, a professional basketball player was accused of killing a heckler. It was an average episode by L&O standards, but there was one piece of the storyline that probably hits home to Coovo and his dad.

The player in question had a deep bond with his high school basketball coach, and often consulted him when in trouble. Many of you already know this, but Tim's dad, Mr. Coover, was the 6th grade basketball coach for reigning N.L. MVP Ryan Howard.


He looks happy doesn't he? Well, you can thank Mr. Coover for that. Tim's dad was the man who single-handedly transformed the 200 lb. power forward into a cleanup hitter. And to this day, Ryan maintains frequent contact with Mr. Coover, and relies on his sage advice.

Last November, when Howard barely beat out Albert Pujols for the MVP award, Pujols had this to say, "Ryan Howard did not deserve the MVP. He is big and fat and should have stuck to basketball. I hope the Cubs don't sign Soriano." Well, it was something like that anyway.

Soon after that statement was released, Ryan placed a call to Mr. Coover and consulted his mentor on the best way to handle the situation. Mr. Coover responded, "Say nothing. Pretend he doesn't exist. Albert Pujols is a flash in the pan. He's 43 years old and will be out of this league by 2008. And he would have never started on our 6th-grade team. Marty (Coover) would have dunked all over him. If anyone believes differently just look at Marty's game film.... Checkmate."

As we all know Howard held his tongue.

The mentor/mentee relationship is a precious one that few are fortunate enough to have. If it weren't for relationships like the one between Ryan Howard and Mr. Coover, there would have been one less episode of Law & Order to watch. And frankly, I don't think I could live in that world.